salt the planet

Chuckie P often jokes about how he tends to some more conservative sides of life, politics, theology, etc. and calls me L.A. - liberal apostate. It is truly a term of endearment as Chuck and I have met every Wednesday for the past two years as accountability partners. So don't take the "label" as anything more than a significant amount of ribbing between friends. We have regular conversations about our different understandings and base this primarily in our friendship.

With that said, Nick and I went to the Late Night Theology Discussion with Tony Jones. It was truly an exercise in humility for me. My greatest struggle was keeping up with all the church fathers and different religious traditions that people discussed. The realization that I know far less than what I think was like a two by four to Tommy Boy's head.

The main idea that I could at least begin to comprehend was that we often refer to theology on the level of second order discourse. Things like talking about a soccer or a car wreck are second order discourse. Things like playing in a soccer or being in a car wreck are first order discourse. Tony said that he is trying to argue that theology is not simply a second level discourse, reflections on the experience of God, but rather a first level discourse, the experience of God as well as its reflection.

Tony himself said few things that reflected his own theological reflections, but rather asked questions to challenge others within the discussion. The only time he spoke up was when someone in the group said their friend came out of a seminar he had led that morning saying this, "I know he didn't say these things, but I know he doesn't believe..." (fill in the blank here, because much was said about what he didn't say and what he really meant.)

I couch this in light of the first two discussions for two reasons:

1. I struggle with putting words in peoples' mouths based on what I think their presuppositions are (fundamentalists, democrats, upper-class, homeless). Yet, comments made about anyone and their beliefs should never come from the inferences about what they must have meant, even though they didn't say it.
   
2. These discussions occur best (between anyone) in the context of relationships, where time, space, and commitment to the person and the work of God in them will allow for respect and redemption on all sides.
   

Nick and I ate with my peg-legged sister (ask me the story later) and her boyfriend today at the American Cafe. It is crazy how many times I have had to squeeze into a parking place this weekend because apparently Nash-villains (that isn't a typo) have no sense of parking straight or even keeping equidistant between the lines. Today I even had to climb out of the car window just to get out. It made me think of the Dukes of Hazzard, but without Daisy.

After lunch, Nick and I hurried back to the convention center. I was looking forward to hearing from Dave Livermore and Steve Argue after reading Steve's blog just a few nights ago. However, since we were late, I missed the first 30 minutes in which they basically outlined the redemptive meta-narrative of scripture. Nothing major really. I did however get to fill in the blanks on the really cool diagram they had. Truthfully though, it was helpful and I look forward to dialoguing with them about their journey toward this.

The second part was transformative as it truly connected with many of the theologissues I have been wrestling with, especially in connecting these grand ideas and thoughts to the up close and personal everyday. The primary tool given was a matrix that helped to implicate us and our students in the meta-narrative of God's redemptive work.

The guys used a clip from the movie Thirteen (props to Chuckie P.) to allow us to begin understanding how to use this matrix in a practical sense in ministry (By the way, if you haven't seen this movie I would highly recommend that anyone in ministry with students watch this). It was a fantastic exercise to examine how we would minister to Tracy (the girl in the movie) in light of the following four categories: theological reflections, personal formation, missional expression, and contextual awareness. Without giving away too much of the info, I would challenge you gals and guys to check out Argue and Livermore's website. It was enlightening to ensure that we balance our ministry approaches along each of these categories, which helps me not to focus more heavily on the aspects I tend toward, which are typically the theological and personal.

While the convention continues to be a fantastic experience and I have yet to enter a seminar through which God did not illumine some part of my journey, the time constraints (aka sleep!) have not allowed me to post on all things in the day. Therefore I will attempt to begin from those things in which I have been most attentive to the movement of God.

In my previous post, I mentioned how I felt as though I have been wrestling with God and had been touched by him as Jacob was: leaving the encounter limping and even affecting the behavior of the entire community of Israel (at least in their eating habits). I pray that my wrestling will similarly affect the community where God has placed me.

Well, doggone wrestling with God has got me in a full nelson, and I'm not quite sure how to get out or even if I want out. I find myself crying to God that I only have two hips and if he "touches" me much more, I won't be able to even get around (which maybe is what he wants).

Nick and I slept in this morning and missed seminar series #2. It was kind of nice though, not to cave to the pressure of doing everything. It was harder to resist than I thought. Anyway, our first experience this morning was Doug Pagitt speaking in general session #3. He did a fantastic job of working with the passages of Acts 10-11. I am going to have to go back and listen to the entire message again, but here are some of the highlights (Doug's statements loosely quoted in blue and my implication of them in green):

• For Peter and the 1st Century Jewish church, the Gentiles were the outsiders: unclean and defiling all who were in contact with them. Who are the outsiders now? Who do we define as in and out and how do we define them that way? Why do we define ourselves in that manner? How do we consider ourselves or others as unclean for being in contact with these outsiders?
• Even though Cornelius was a Gentile, not only did God hear his prayers and give acceptance to his actions with the poor (verse 4), but he also heard from God. How quick am I to assume that God does not hear the prayers of the outsider (especially those on the "outside" of a relationship with God)? How often do I believe that God does not recognize or accept the actions of the outsider?
• Peter asked the question, "Why did you send for me?" He did not come in and begin telling them what he thought they needed. How often do I step into a conversation with an outsider and not listen to their experience but would rather share of the "visions" and amazing things I have seen first. I must seek to posture myself to hear from "outsiders" as God may well have been speaking to them, offering them the completion of the picture.

Update (1/05/06): Doug has added the podcast for this message at this link.

On to the second movement in the world of the YS convention!

In the second part of the Critical Concerns Course, Mark focused less on self and more on dealing with conflict and moving as a team.

He made several primary statements that stuck out to me (None of which seem directly related now outside of context). However, they all revolve around the first one, which sums up a major part of who he portrayed himself as. (None of these are direct quotations, but rather loose summaries, which probably mean they carry more of my biases than they should. Apologies.)

• He said that his end is not to show you his way but to let you struggle with yours. Therefore he often makes comments that he may not even hold to himself, but simply serve as a way to make you struggle with what he is saying.
• He also said that we have a tendency to manage everyone else and try to control things rather than move alongside with what is happening in the light of how God is working.
  
• How am I going to be the steward of God's image in my life and in the lives of others?
  

He stated some things that, on the surface seemed contradictory to my being, but rather than post them here (and thus misrepresent a man that I have only spent a number of hours with), I choose to wrestle with them and would encourage any others who may be posting on the Convention to do the same. We can surely give our thoughts, but we must do so with humility in light of the nature of interaction we have had with the presenters. We may try to represent or even quote what has been said, but that will most likely carry with it too many of our own biases. I am going to try and walk nimbly around this as I know it is a danger of the blogosphere, especially when we rarely experience the full context of what was said.

After many broken promises and unfinished posts, here is my first...welcome to the blogosphere!!!

I am attending the National Youth Worker's Convention in Nashville this weekend and have been highly anticipating it as a sabbath for my partner in crime... I mean ministry, (Nick) and myself.

We were a little late in arriving to our Critical Concerns Course but this was more than made up for at the registration table as we received the sweetest man purse (murse) I have ever seen just because we were first timers! Maybe I should be a first timer every year!

After gearing up, Nick and I made our way to the course, led by Mark Dowds called One: Discovering the Power and Freedom of True Community as a Leadership Team.

As we moved through the session, I found that much of what Mark was saying seemed less directed toward how to develop and build a team and more about what I can be as a member of that team.

We discussed the things we are committed to for ourselves, our family and friends, and our community. He also discussed the need to be present in every situation. These made me think about how I am so caught up in my own philosophies, musings, and ideas that I am not present with people in their conversation, their life, what matters to them.

The big picture for me came as Mark began to discuss the idea that we are all made in God's image and how that should shape all of our interactions with anyone. He talked about, instead of seeking out the bad or evil in people, we should seek to find the redemptive workings and reflections of God in their lives in order to illuminate that. This would lead to a person becoming more and more in the image of God, which is what we were intended to be from the beginning.

The primary idea behind Mark's premise was grounded in how we view ourselves in light God's image. According to him, Calvin said that the image of God was effaced within us. The image of God is gone and the work to be done is to put in what our depravity has removed. Mark approached this issue from Calvin's perspective as a glass half emypty type of idea. The glass half full idea, then, is that we are defaced of the image of God: it is distorted, but can be found. Therefore, the work to be done is to draw out what God put in.

I felt like Jacob wrestling with the angel. It has been an accurate picture for my being these past few months. Struggling with new experiences and ideas has become the hallmark of me recently. So when Mark began to illuminate many of the ideas I had not yet been able to fully grapple with, it was like the angel had touched my thigh. (Don't get me wrong, I was not looking at Mark like an angel!) I knew my walking around, going about life would be different yet I am still unsure how. I know that the wrestling and struggle is not over, but I also know that there is something different.